A little vacation...

We were able to finally get away for a few days this week. We went to Glenwood Springs with the kids and stayed in a great hotel. It is over 100 years old with all kinds of fun pictures all over as well as beds that felt like they were 100 years old! We played in the hot springs with the kids, ate way to much and had a great time just being together. I was actually able to relax for an extended period of time for the first time in more than 8 months. It felt so good to be away from the phones, computer and the dust that is rapidly accumulating in my house. I needed this....I do think for the first time in a long time I laughed without thinking of Pearl. It was so good to be with my husband and kids in an environment where we were not distracted. However, I still did feel like one of us was missing. I couldn't help but to feel like we should have been asking for a table of 6. I so want to have another little one running around here and we are just praying for the right time. Part of me is scared to try again and the other part of me is sure that God would not let this happen to us again. I can't have the baby phase here end the way it did. I don't think we are not finished yet. I know this will be a huge surprise to some people that we are willing to try this again, and maybe we are crazy but I just don't think we are done. I do know God is not finished with us either.......Josh and I had a lot of time to talk this week. We talked about where we felt like God is leading us and what may be ahead if us in the next 5 years. Book writing, speaking, leading, babies, new jobs, teenagers!, vacations, and doing life with those around us that we love. Life is bigger than we imagine and I know the past 8 months of our lives we have seen how big things are around us. We do see through the glass dimly on this side of eternity and I hope that at times we can get the scraper out and see through that glass more clearly at times. I want to have the character to live large even through the hard times and keep pressing forward. I am trying.....I want to keep going and meeting others on the journey that we are walking on and walk together. I think I'll go kiss my kids now and curl up with my latest book, "Rooms of Marvels"...a book about heaven. Maybe I'll dream of Pearl tonight. I can only hope.....