Monday, April 07, 2008

All That I Can Say

Much to be thinking about tonight...J is out of town and I should go to bed. I am sitting here weeping for another family who had to say hello and then goodbye to their baby tonight. A precious family who will see their baby again someday...the someday just feels to far away. I am remembering our hours with Pearl as well as the days, weeks and months that followed. My heart is breaking for another mom who has empty arms and an ache in her heart that will never go away. I wish I really knew this mom...instead of just from a blog. I would just sit and cry with her...talk about our girls together and dream of the day when we are all reunited.

I am weary tonight....I need Him to fill me again...fill me with hope and peace instead of the fear that I continue to battle.

I know He is there....He has promised that.

All That I Can Say

Lord I'm tired
So tired from walking
And Lord I'm so alone
And Lord the dark
Is creeping in
Creeping up
To swallow me
I think I'll stop
Rest here a while

And didn't You see me cry'n?
And didn't You hear me call Your name?
Wasn't it You I gave my heart to?
I wish You'd remember
Where you sat it down

Chorus:And this is all that I can say right now
And this is all that I can give

I didn't notice You were standing here
I didn't know that
That was You holding me
I didn't notice You were cry'n too
I didn't know that
That was You washing my feet

Edited....This is an incredible song by David Crowder from his very first album released in 1998.

8 comments:

Shanygne said...

ugh. I HATE HATE HATE that anyone else has to go thru all this STUFF!

and that poem/song/whatever was awesome... did you write it?? oh. wow...

Hope you have a good day... I love you.

Aimee said...

You have such a compassionate heart. I love you!

Adrienne said...

Friend,
I have been thinking about you as Angie and family walk through this journey...glimpses for me into what those days were like for you and J. I love you! I wish we had been in touch when you walked through your life with Pearl...you, literally walking with her every day, caring for her and loving her, in your womb, and then in your arms. For some reason God had us reconnect after the fact. I'm guessing it is because we are still here, walking day to day, with hope of eternal things, yet living with the heartaches that some days are tolerable and others, well, the days where sitting and crying together just make sense...

Anonymous said...

Praying for you my friend. Miss you and weeping with you for Pearl and Audrey. Love you, Nicole

Anonymous said...

Hi, I know you don't know me, but I wanted to tell you how beautiful your blog is. Thank you for your transparency. I there when you spoke last July (NIFLA in Colo Spgs?) It too, was beautiful and really touched my soul. I have referred to your situation on more than one occasion while encouraging other people with an adverse diagnosis to carry to term. Thank you and God bless you!! Joy Gault RN

Anonymous said...

I miss your face. Not enough days... WHEN oh WHEN can we get away and pray, eat, drink, pray some more and laugh, cry, and laugh some more...

The gift of mercy is a hard one. You are amazing. xo e

boltefamily said...

It is hearatbreaking to know others feel this unbearable pain. I LOVE that song so much! Thanks for sharing! I will pray for you heart tonight and the hearts of the other family

Anonymous said...

Hi dear friend,
Somehow, from link to link to link I found myself at Angie's blog. Don't even know how. But as soon as I could see again for the tears, I had to make my way here.
I've thought about you so much the past couple of months, Laura. You and Pearl.
Much love to you, Laura.
In Christ alone,
Kari